A Gratitudal Landing (Part 2)

I am trying, forgive me... 1

Remember how I wrote about the vulture landing? Well, keep that in mind all through the end! 

Almost everyday, at least one of our teachers talk about parents and our duty towards them, and I sense my friend sitting next to me wiping her tears, and the whole day one of them tells me her stories with her mother which makes me emotional too. And at the same time, I am reminded how I am not grateful for the blessing of having my parents around everyday! (May Allah grant our parents long life in His Obedience. Ameen)

When I see my own mother run behind my youngest brother to make him eat his food or for a bath and how he throws tantrums almost every time and my mother patiently tackles him with ease, subhanAllah, I think to myself, I must have been no less!

And when my brother adamantly asks for something after my father comes back from office tired, my father still goes and gets it for him. And again I think, I must have been the same when I was his age.

اللّهم رب ارحمهما كما ربياني صغيرا

Allah says:

{وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا ۚ إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُللَّهُمَا قَوْلًا كَرِيمًا }

And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], “uff,” and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. (Surah Isra’ 17:23)

Tawheed is one of the strongest pillars in our religion, in fact, we were not created except to worship him. If you notice, after Allah mentions our sole purpose in this life, that is to live and die in the state of Tawheed, He immediately mentions dutifulness to the parents. The scholars say that, Allah has mentioned it together because of the high status of dutifulness towards parents. After Allah, it is because of them that we are here, grown to this level in knowledge and otherwise.

The word Ihsan إحسان is more than just good treatment. It is going a step further to please them, sacrificing our desires just so that we could bring a smile in their faces.
And then when Allah says :  ( فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَا أُفٍّ ), the word ‘uff’ is the least form of showing ungratefulness to them through your words. If they ask you to do something, and you don’t do it wholeheartedly, it also comes under being ungrateful to them. (By the way, you know anything about the word ‘uff’ being the shortest word in Arabic? So Allah used this to tell us not even the shortest word can be used against them.)

When we were babies, how many times have our parents, changed our diapers, cleaned the mess that we made, made them lose their sleep by our constant crying and when we grew a little bit, we didn’t understand what we wanted, yet they understood us perfectly, they sacrificed their time, their energy just to see us smile. They still do that for us. They would go any extent to make sure we get what we want.

Yet, they did and do that wholeheartedly.

When we went out, or with guests, we must have told things or done things that is considered ‘non sense’, yet they didn’t stop loving us our buying us things we love.

And now when we think we have grown up so much, and when our mother doesn’t know how to us the recent gadgets, we tend to show arrogance, and look down upon them. May Allah forgive us all.

Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) says: “You haven’t done a fraction because when your mother took care of you, she did it out of genuine love wanting to see you flourish, grow, and live for a long time.  Now that you are doing it back, you are doing it as a burden and as a favor back to her waiting for her to die.  How can you compare the two?  How can you compare that attitude of love and compassion with your attitude of ‘I will pay you back’?  You have done good, but you haven’t done a fraction of what she did for you.”

Allah further says:

{وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا }
And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, “My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small. (Surah Isr’a 17:24)

This is where the vulture comes into picture, no matter how high it flies, it comes down slowly, and lands hardly disturbing anything around it. This is one of the lingual beauty of the Qur’an. See how Allah, uses the bird to show us how we are supposed to be with our parents,  ( وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ) (Lower to them the wings of mercy..)

Similarly, regardless of how far we go in life, when it comes to our parents, we should come down, be humble, walk in their shadows, and never to take a step forward in arrogance or walk in pride when we are with them.
In fact, Abu Huraira (may Allah be pleased with him) also says, we must not walk in front of them or sit before they sit or call them by their names.

We are indebted to our parents our whole life, how much ever we do, we would fail to repay them. Lets cherish them when we have them, for they are one of our doors to Jannah.

A ṣaḥābi’s father passed away and he was crying very much at the funeral.  One of the other ṣaḥābah came and comforted him and tried to console him and said, “O so-and-so, I am not crying just because my father died.  I know inshā’Allāh he is in a better place now than he was in this world.  I am crying because my biggest door to Jannah has now been shut.

May Allah forgive us and our parents, make us the coolness of their eyes, and resurrect us with them in the highest levels of Jannah. Ameen.

– Rafeef Bint AbdulMannan 

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